Spiritual Renewal, Pt. 2

I meant to write this post on Monday, but I got laid the fuck out with the flu for a couple of days. [update] I've now been trying to finish this post for a week.

I left off talking about my slow slide into emotional oblivion regarding my father's death. I don't know that I've hit rock bottom with this thing yet, I'd like to think that I have, but it seems kind of unlikely based on what others have told me about dealing with the death of a parent.

I had been feeling shitty (not physically, emotionally) all last week, but the lone bright spot was that Ta-Nehisi Coates had a book signing coming up in College Park that I planned to attend. If you haven't read his book "The Beautiful Struggle" run, don't walk, to your nearest book store and pick up a copy. Just like I try not to be too hard on stupid motherfuckers, I also try not to sweat dudes too much that I think are cool, smart, tough, or whatever. I mean, no one wants to be a dick rider, right?

But rules are made to be broken, so here goes the one time you will catch me on someone's tip like this. I won't go so far as to say this is the best book that I've ever read or that it's my favorite book of all time; I'll need to read and re-read the book several more times before I'll be comfortable making that pronouncement, but this book did speak to me in a way that no other book I have ever read has.

In the same way that "Catcher in the Rye" has been a cultural touchstone for generations or "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" is practically required reading for teenagers, "The Beautiful Struggle" deserves a place in the pantheon of great American coming of age stories. "The Beautiful Struggle" is an instant classic, written in a unique style that seamlessly melds literature and hip-hop into a brilliant narrative about fathers, sons, and the journey from boy to man.

Needless to say, I was very excited to meet Ta-Nehisi at his book signing. When I arrived I saw Ta-Nehisi browsing through the store so I approached him and introduced myself. I shared all of the thoughts above with him and he seemed to be truly humbled and grateful that his book evoked such a strong reaction from me. As cool as it was to meet Ta-Nehisi, it was a total mind blower to meet his father, Mr. Paul Coates, who was there that evening. Even though I had only read the book a few months before I had forgotten how funny it was and it took on a whole new life when I heard its author reading it in his own voice.

BigDaddyRat was a man who loved to read and he shared that love with me, it was one of the many, many gifts he gave me over the course of our time together. In some ways, I guess my upbringing led me to (incorrectly) believe that I was the only young Black man out there that was into Sci-Fi, that liked to read, and saw no disconnect with those things and being Black. So in that context it was reassuring and comforting to be at that book signing, to know that "The Beautiful Struggle" spoke to others in the same that it spoke to me.

Being at Vertigo with some other Black men of letters was exactly what I needed that evening. It gave me a sense of spiritual renewal to feel, to know, that no matter how isolated I may feel or be at a given moment, that I'm a link in a chain.

I had a rough couple of weeks, but for the time being I'm on the upswing.

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Prop 8 and the Nonsense it Has Wrought

I don't usually make a point of staying up on what's going on in California politics, but this Prop 8 thing is worth paying attention to. As a Black man who isn't down with homophobia, the backlash towards African-Americans because California voters came down on the side of bigotry and intolerance is troubling and starting to piss me the fuck off. Dan Savage, the homophobe's bogeyman, a dude who always struck me as being pretty level-headed and pragmatic is now foaming at the mouth like a loon blaming Black people for the Prop 8 debacle.

A quick spin around the interwebs shows that plenty of brothers and sisters, gay and straight, are upset and speaking out against this latest bit of bullshit in Cali. This hasn't been enough to prevent people who are, quite rightfully, upset about the vote on Prop 8 from calling Black people niggers. I'm annoyed that despite the progress we seem to be making as a society, when some shit goes wrong the first thing that many people want to do is try to blame Black people.

Even so, I refuse to respond to the hate and stupidity being shown by some with more hate and stupidity. I'm feeling optimistic and strong these days and I feel compelled to use that optimism and strength in a positive way, so I say this to all of my gay brothers and sisters (Black, White, Yellow, Brown, and any other color there may be out there): I'm still here with you. Call me a nigger all you want to, I don't give a fuck, it's just a word; a word that is powerless unless I give it power and I refuse to do that any more. You're pissed and rightfully so, you see the great promise of this country coming closer to reality but at the same time you see yourselves continuing to be marginalized and discriminated against. It's fucked up and wrong, but we've got work to do and fighting with each other over who is to blame doesn't help anyone.

I'm sure someday Ta-Nehisi is going to say something that I disagree with, maybe he already has and I missed it, but for now I remain unabashedly on his tip. He sums up my feelings on this senseless conflict perfectly.

Today is the first day I haven't hit my goal of 500 words for the day since I made a new commitment to this blog and to myself. I'm not gonna trip about it, if I wanted to come up with 60 more words to type I know that I could but that seems kind of stupid.

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Sinking to New Depths

You knew that McCain and the GOP were in trouble this year when Karl Rove started criticizing them for putting out ads, "that are, you know, beyond the 100-percent-truth test." Think about how low you have to sink to have your integrity and the veracity of your statements questioned by Turd Blossom. The mind boggles.

But apparently the McCain campaign decided that running false ads, choosing an unqualified VP, and creating lame distractions isn't going to be enough to carry the day. It looks like the GOP is jumping in their wayback machine for a "what's old is new again" dirty trick: voter disenfranchisement.

There's been a lot of talk about disenfranchisement in Florida during the 2000 election, but the GOP seems to have decided to expand their program. Naturally, after the Michigan GOP got cold busted in the cynical and, dare I say, downright unAmerican attempt to stifle voting rights; they immediately started backpedaling but still admitted to using other tactics and techniques to suppress voter turnout.

Thankfully our man in the field, Senator Obama, has directed his campaign to file suit over the disgusting practice of using foreclosure lists to keep people from voting. It also looks like slightly more mainstream media outlets are starting to pick up on the story as well.

When the GOP wonders why there aren't more Black Republicans, they would do well to remember this kind of shit and how it looks to us African-Americans.

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The Beautiful Struggle

I've been in the tank for Ta-Nehisi Coates since the first time I read his blog a few months ago. In addition to bringing a strong voice new voice to the Blogosphere, TC is the only blogger (that I'm aware of) that has seen fit to bless me with a link. I hold tight to that link as a soupçon of legitimacy for my blogging. Herr Coates just published his first book earlier this year, The Beautiful Struggle and I finally got a chance to read it.

I'm gonna try not to get too caught up in a bunch of superlatives here, but the book is damn good. Even though I'm a few years older than TC and we had vastly different upbringings, I knew that as a Black man and an aspiring writer this book was going to have something to say to me. I read the book in two sittings; after I woke up from a nap today I read the first half while enjoying a couple of hours home alone and then after I put BabyRat to bed I finished it off. I think the last book I devoured like this was the Godfather.

What struck me about this book was that it seems like a spiritual companion to so many other great coming of age stories, both real and fictional. Even though I want every Black man and boy in America to read this book, I hope that others who didn't grow up Black or in an urban environment will read this book and find some reflection of themselves and their life in TC's words.

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Another Reason to the Hate the DNC

I've been really down on the DNC for years now, in large part because they treat Black voters as being completely and totally beholden to them. Billary's shameful performance during the primaries this year have done nothing to change that opinion.

But the biggest reason I can't stand the DNC is that they are stunningly incompetent. One of my friends described the DNC as having, " . . . a tattoo of a target between their toes and ankle and no matter what, they just fucking refuse to have it lasered off." That explains the nomination of Al Gore in 2000 and John Kerry in 2004, the two worst Democratic Presidential candidates of my lifetime.

Now to compound the DNC's myriad sins, we have reports that members of the Afro-sphere are largely being shut out of the State Blogger Corps (they have floor access all four days, are seated next to their state delegations, and will have internet access) for the DNC Convention this Summer.

It's not that I think there is/was a concerted effort to shut out Black bloggers, but rather there was no attempt to make sure that this very important constituency of the DNC was included.

Typical shameful shit by the DNC.

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At the Barber Shop

My man Darios just opened up his own shop called District Cutters that's located behind the new cigar joint on Florida, I met him when we was cutting at Mason's down on H St. The place is small, only three chairs, but newly finished so it's super comfortable and clean.

I recognize the other barber that was there from Mason's but I don't know his name, it turns out that this other barber, Darios, and the dude waiting with me for a cut are all from Boston. It was interesting to hear these cats old-timing about Boston; talking about the bus routes they used to take and getting chased out of Cambridge by the brothers that lived there. For all the hue and cry about young Black men and how everyone is so afraid of them, the real truth is that they're much more of a danger to each other than they are to everyone else. I say "they" because me and the other bros at the barbershop yesterday are all in our mid to late 30's, we are (for the most part) out of the danger zone; we have been lucky and/or smart enough to make it past the years when an error in judgment was more likely to be fatal or land us in jail.

All the years that I was cutting my own hair I forgot the sense of spiritual renewal that I tend to get from going to the barber shop. I know that sounds kind of corny, but there's really nothing quite like it. Where else can you go where you will find preachers, teachers, thugs, cops, executives, janitors, politicians, construction workers, etc. all existing in perfect harmony? The barber shop is neutral ground, everyone leaves their bullshit at the door and is free to speak their mind. Sometimes that freedom to speak your mind leads people to say some unbelievably stupid things, like the time these guys were speculating that all White people were pre-disposed towards bestiality. I probably should have said something to the contrary, but I was laughing too hard at the ridiculous anecdotes being related to make any kind of strong argument. Still, just listening that day gave me some interesting insight into how whack stereotypes come into being.

There was also a dope ass classic Impala parked outside too, check it out.

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