The Littlest Rat

At 1:12pm on July 6, 2009 our family became complete when we were joined by the Littlest Rat. LR weighed in at 10 pounds 12 ounces and when he was born the midwife told WifeRat, "Congratulations, you just gave birth to a two month old!!"

It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks. If you saw my last blog post, that was sent from Jimmy Valentine's Lonely Hearts Club after I had taken the family to Ocean City for a day trip to the beach. Why go all the way to Ocean City when North Beach/Chesapeake Beach is less than an hour away? Well, WifeRat needed to get to the ocean while she was pregnant. A couple of months ago I had promised her we would get to the ocean before the baby was born and I had to, as BabyRat would say, "Keep it a promise."

The next weekend was the 4th of July. So naturally there was a cookout (organized by others in the building), fireworks, and much excitement. WR only made a brief appearance, just long enough for everyone to gawk at her big belly, before retreating back to air conditioned comfort.

I'm also happy to report that on the 4th of July we met a new babysitter! BabySitterRat is 16 and her and BR are in love with each other, they spent a good portion of the late afternoon/early evening on the 4th playing together and seem to be a perfect match. When I asked BabySitterRat's parents about her working for us, her Dad asked me, "Does your child ever hear the N-word in your house?" I was stunned and didn't know what to say, mostly because I drop the N-bomb all the time around the house*.

So I'm standing there giving this guy a blank look going, "Humina, humina, humina," when he breaks into a broad smile and says, "I meant the word 'no'." He goes on to explain that BSR had been taking care of some kid, told him he couldn't do something, and the parents came home and gave her a raft of shit for "disciplining" their child. At this point he got involved and told BSR's former employers they were idiots and decided that after that incident he needed to find out where people's heads were at before he allowed his daughter to work for them. Seeing as how I'm the kind of guy who wanted to talk to him *before* I hired his daughter to look after my kid, I don't think we'll have any problems.

Finally, the Monday after the 4th of July, WifeRat woke me up and informed me that she was in labor while weeping tears of joy. We hugged excitedly and cheered our good fortune that I could just take BR to school while she delivered the baby before I went back to sleep. I was buffeted by twin feelings of panic and calm as BR and I had a fairly normal 7am start to a school day. The morning started so normal (with the exception of calling the mid-wife and birth assistant) that the original plan was for me to stop for coffee after I dropped BR at school.

By the time I actually left to take BR to school, WifeRat reported that her contractions had started coming fast & furious. When BabyRat was born WR went into labor about the same time (4am-ish) and we didn't even go to the birth center until 2pm, but it was pretty clear that the LittlestRat was coming and coming quickly. WifeRat talked on the phone to Go To Girl while I ran BR to school real quick.

I won't get into all the details of the birth, but I must confess that I did fall asleep for about 25 minutes towards the end of the birth while holding one of WifeRat's leg aloft. What I will say is how awesome our midwife and birth assistant were through out the whole birth experience, I can't imagine that we could have had two more thoughtful, kind, encouraging, and professional women attending LR's birth. They were truly amazing and I will spend the rest of my life being grateful to them for helping my wife bring my son into the world.


*I find it most hilarious to address my Irish/German/Norwegian wife who hails from North Dakota as, "Nigga." Of course WifeRat doesn't find it nearly as funny as I do, but sometimes she'll let out a titter of amusement in spite of herself.